Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Twyla

We have a guest post from "D" today.  Happy Dating!

I can still remember dear sweet Twyla (not her real name). Twyla was a teller at the bank I went to and she was kind of cute. Not the kind of cute that made me want to hop the counter, explore the vault and make a deposit, but more like a Kia Sophia rental car. I wanted to race it across town, burn the wheels off and then return it, no strings attached.

I flirted, she flirted back. I suggested going for a drink, she giggled. The warm up was good; I was just waiting to put it in drive.

Well, I got her number and said I would call in a few days. You might imagine my shock then when she called me the next night. Are you wondering why I didn’t mention that she got my number too? Well, that’s because I never gave it to her, she just went into the computer at work and got it from there…yea, no kidding.

Now I’m guessing psycho but I decide to play along because I’m still thinking Kia rental so what the hell. We agree to meet at this dive of a diner (absolute shit hole) for coffee. Prior to going I mentioned to my roomy that he needed to call me in an hour and a half and give me an out….just in case.

So what happens next is right out of Springer. I walk in, find Twyla, approach the table and discover that it’s a party of 3. Sitting comfortably in his car seat is a 6 month old baby boy. Next I’m told that Twyla’s mom and dad are sitting in the booth behind us…they are apparently there because Twyla does not drive and therefore needed a ride. I am then told that the parents decided to stay and have dinner because well, why not eat at this great establishment, you know you want to.

I struggled for the right words at first and probably made an ass of myself but Twyla was cool and seemed relatively peeved that mom and dad had stayed…although she was not too concerned about the effect of baby boy. After a sip of sumptuous diner coffee (made for old people with no taste buds), I started asking about baby. It turns out that dad split the minute he found out that Twyla was preggo and Twyla was not shy that she was looking for a “daddy” to help raise the little man.

At about that point my pecker had begun to head home. Willy was already pissed that some other guy had stolen the Kia idea but my brain and Willy don’t talk much so I got the message late.

7 comments:

noloveforyou said...

So... did the parents shamelessly eavesdrop, or did they at least politely pretend to pay attention to their own cups of coffee?

drewr said...

This story got a little long and for that I apologize, but here is the ending...

After a half hour of mindless chatting about clothes for junior and the cost of diapers I was ready for a half rack of something that would erase memories. Somehow my roomy was on the same wavelength. I answered his call and he made up some lame story about how the hot water heater had burst at home and….you’re laughing but it worked.

Here I was trolling for a date and wound up being pegged for daddy-O. I suppose it could have gone just horribly worse than it did but the event forced me to change branches and stop flirting with bank tellers. I also swore off Kias.

Dennis Miedema said...

As a dating coach, the only thing I can say here is: the first rule of dating is...

Never go on a date if you don't know where she's coming from! Her story, her background or so to speak.

I've had this happen to me once too. I've went on dates where she "accidently" took her best friend along for the ride and even dates where she didn't show up at first because she wanted to see if I took her seriously, lol!

So don't go on a date that soon, even if a woman does something crazy like calling you while you didn't give your number.

If she's not right for you, you waste time, energy, and money on it. Plus, it discourages you to go out next time and hey... disappointment and frustration anyone?

So think with your big head before you think with the little one ;-)

To More Dating Success,

Dennis Miedema
Win With Women

Anonymous said...

Mr. Dating Coach,
A "best friend" on a date is very different from parents or babies. Sounds like she wasn't comfortable being alone with you. That doesn't say something about her as much as it does about you.

Ladies, please leave the kiddos at home even if you are lookin' for a baby daddy.

Anonymous said...

So, dating coach. You sound like a D-bag. Plus, you're so low-rent all you can do is comment on dating blogs, you can't even afford to actually BUY ads?

Get over yourself.

Anonymous said...

"D" is for Daddy. Kinda sounds like you're a dork with an ego who shouldn't be driving rental cars. Dennis Win With Women... if you can't tell that a woman brings a friend along on a DATE because it's just a hang-out date then you really should not be blogging on how to Win With Women. Either that or you should send your horror stories to the nice people who run this site and let us Bitchy Anonymous Peeps all give YOU some advice.

SGLoughlin said...

Nice to see DIW flaming is alive and well..