Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Ex Card

Here's another guest post from one of our beloved readers, Anne.

I was going through a difficult time with an ex and was trying to move on. So, when this new boy came along and asked me if I wanted to hang out, I thought, "why not?" He was cute, seemed quite funny, and he knew some of the same people as me so I felt safe meeting him. After a couple of dates, I realized that this wasn't going to go anywhere. He talked a LOT, and most of what he said was nonsensical. Basically, we didn't connect. After a few dates, I wondered why I had let myself spend so much time with him....

One given day, I was looking forward to seeing my ex, but he let me down, as usual. I ended up sad and in bed by 10:30. So, when the new boy sent a text asking if he could come round, I said why not. After all, I was shaved, moisturized within an inch of my life, and ready to go. Here's what happened next.

He started talking. I shouldn't have been surprised, I suppose. But he soon went into a spiel about how he had been told that he he looked happy, and it was from hanging out with me. I didn't care, and I told him so. After all, I didn't like him. What's worse, is that he thought me telling him that I wasn't interested was me being shy or demure - that I didn't believe him and needed some reassurance. Ha. He should have shut his mouth and just gotten down to the reason for his visit.

As if that weren't enough, he started talking about his mother and her three boyfriends. They were all the opposite of keepers, to put it simply. When I suggested that perhaps she was going through a breakdown, he SCREAMED at me, saying how she's been like this for 8 YEARS! And I still don't care. Neither did I care about his rough upbringing in Philly, or his several trips to prison, including a two week stint in maximum security. Excuse me?!!!

At this point, I realize that it's definite, I never want to see him again. But it's obvious that this one needs to be handled with care. Though he sends me text after text - what am I up to, can we get brunch? - I play the "ex" card, say I still feel weird, and he understands. It wasn't a lie, but it did the trick, and I'll certainly be playing that card again.

If you liked that little tale, check out Anne's blog at http://annesaneries.wordpress.com/.


M. Washington Freeman said...

Wow, you sound like a total bitch.

Serial Monogamist said...

I'm afraid I don't get it. He talked too much, so you wanted him to fuck off, but then you wanted to fuck him, so you had him over, and were a jerk to him, then you said something about an ex so he'd leave you alone?

Is this one of those Charlie Sheen wins I keep hearing about?

I don't know. I'm le tired.

Anonymous said...

Just keep doing good content.

Anonymous said...

LOL this is funny because I recently had someone play the ex card on me. I really liked him and all his actions indicated that he liked me just as much. Why aren't people just more open and honest?

Darren Miller said...

I’m sure you made this guy really nervous for him to talk so much, that is what nervous guys do.

When I read this post, it seems that your intentions were just to bed him, and if I were you, I would have brought out wine to shut him up and relax him (in the nicest possible way).

I remember dating, well, seeing a motor mouth girl who reminded me of the girl from the American Pie film.

I made sure I always had alcohol at reach, so if she happened to randomly pop round the drink was there.

Sunny said...

Damn he sounds weird... stay away!