Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Surreptitious Pleasures

**Editors' Note: Today's guest post comes in from Terry Tucker. And um, gross.**

Friend of mine met this great guy….…..smart, good looking, fun - and thoughtful! When they were walking down the street, he would stop to pick up litter, even discarded cigarette butts.

On subsequent dates, everything good…..although she did notice him sneaking surreptitiously outside for a cigarette. Trying to quit, he said, when asked about it. Later, when she noticed him picking up and pocketing a cigarette butt off the street, something clicked. You don’t smoke those, do you, she asked.

He hesitated, then admitted he did. At first, he did it out of desperate addiction, he said. Better than buying cigarettes or bumming them. Then serendipity, he discovered smoking butts was more satisfying than regular cigarettes. Nicotine tends to accumulate on the paper at the lower end, resulting in a more concentrated delivery of nicotine when you inhale a pre-smoked butt. When you inhale, a tremendous rush. It’s wonderful, he enthused. And you get better and better at spotting the good ones.

What about germs, she wanted to know. Oh, I wipe the cigarettes off first, he assured her. Hasn’t been a problem for me. They say that kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray. This was worse than that.


June said...

I did this during my "I don't care I'm an angry, dirty adolescent" phase. This is the same phase in which my friends and I would ride the bus barefoot, drink sodas people left at the bus stop and spit on the floors inside public places. We also smoked a lot of pot and occasionally put cigarettes out on our own flesh.

The grubby 19 year old boys we dated at the time didn't seem to mind. Then again, they were 19-year-old creeps and we were 13.

itinerantwoman said...

june, what in hell were you doing dating 19-year-old boys when you were only 13?

[i didn't do that until my early thirties.]

Serial Monogamist said...

Well ... "dating" is a strong word. "Using for their pot" is much more accurate.