Monday, April 6, 2009

Craigslist Personal - Older and Fat

**Editors' Note: We couldn't make this shit up.**

Reply to: pers-75cz3-1085924688@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-03-21, 5:01PM PDT

Here you have a 46 yo 300# fat balding man, that has bad teeth, a job that bearly pays the bills and is a paycheck away from being kick out of a rented place to live.. I also have a son, thats still under 18, and hes my little guy that keeps me going.. I would like to find a sugar woman, that would like to be there for me when I am bored.. I love to cook, cuddle and give massages.. and of course have sex, I am not well endowed, but love the forplay, giving and receiving.. I have been looking for a soulmate for ages on many web sites, but once they know what I look like, I never hear from them again. I would love to be a one lady's man, but for right now I want the compainonship of someone.... I get very lonely in my king size bed... I not looking for any Barbie type, but would enjoy one. But thats dreaming, I do love to watch the young ladies that think they are God's gift to man, but I know that they are way out of my reach... If that ever happened I know that I would die in bed...(hopefully a happy man). So here I am just dreaming that someone is out there for me.....

http://bend.craigslist.org/m4w/1085924688.html

6 comments:

dkgoodman said...

Definitely not dating material. He can't spell worth a dam. ;)

Seeker of the 4 S's said...

That just makes me sad for him. Poor dude. I wonder if he will get any sympathy replies?

Miss Yvonne said...

Okay so he's fat, bald, broke and has a tiny penis but hey...he has a king-size bed. Get in line, ladies!

Kate said...

That makes me sad...not sad enough to date him, but sad for him anyway.

Serial Monogamist said...

Here's why you can't find a woman, douchey:

"I not looking for any Barbie type, but would enjoy one. ...... If that ever happened I know that I would die in bed...(hopefully a happy man)."

Hey, you're old and fat and have a teenyween. Your best bet is to develop a genuine attraction to old, fat ladies who don't mind a teenyween. Doi. Get your head our of your ass and stop telling the chubby old girls with rashes that you prefer that they were thin and had giant boobs, and *maybe* you'll stand a chance at love. *maybe*

"Slightly Disheveled" said...

I look around me here in Bend and there really doesn't seem to be a shortage of Dirty Fat Ugly Gals for these Dirty Fat Ugly Men. It must be that the Dirty Fat Ugly Gals don't have the interwebs. I think we need to organize an Interwebs for the Dirty Fat Ugly Gals: IDFUG.